It is like everything had started to go downhill. Within me. Out of my control. I just need to rest and absorb all the information one at a time. After a nice and peaceful 2010, 2011 approaches with lots of feelings. Feelings and stuffs which I had ignored in 2010. And thus, the spirit of 2010 is coming down to haunt my 2011. And I would put them off till 2012. And I tell myself, I should not let time heal everything. Including the Starbucks napkins and letters which I wrote and will never sent to the intended recipient. Not in this lifetime.
I know I will get over with this crap soon. How soon? Soon. I just tell myself. Soon. But I have no idea how I'm going to pass it. It is just so unexpected. I kind of anticipated it, but then, still did not want to face it. I do not want to run away. I want to face it. however, it involves not just me, but others too. So how would others view it???
They and me and we and us are fine by the current situation. We need not talk about it. we are just fine, a million invisible lines. I try to play along the lines. For the everyone is observing your outside. Because they interact with your outer self. This shell which you used to mask your inner-self. The outer self which you use to embrace others. No one would care about your inner self, because no one would interact with it, because you had hid it so well. It is all about the way one present oneself.
So should I just go for it???
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