Today is the eleventh day of the first month of the eleventh year of the current second millennium of planet Earth, according to the Georgian calendar. Which meant that all of our wishes will come true TWICE!!! And so is mine! But with some twist and turns.
The interview was a partial success! Half of me do not want to be selected and another half of me want to be selected. I just felt like not wanting any job currently. With some unexpected great results from the term papers! Biz stats was like a breeze today! Managed to pass with 60% exactly despite me using the wrong table and still get 3 pathetic marks. Life's great isn't it? You screw up a question, and you still get some form of rewards. And I had the full 12 marks at the last question! Ok, its no big deal, when like 5 people had it all correct. But I just felt that for the first time ever, I'm proud of my grades, despite it being so undesired from my expectations. Being proud of your work is the best form of enjoyment! I'm not boasting or anything, but when I received my O level result like last year, I am not very proud of it. In fact, I don't have any feeling about it at all. I don't know why people are shivering or anything like that. Maybe I knew all along that I am going to crap the way through?
Oh, and by the way, O level is so much easier than PSLE. In terms of the stress level. Maybe when we are like 12 years old, we are not able to handle stress as proper as in 16 year old.
Yesterday, people had obtained their O level result. This would in a way affect their future. For me, I just bang through this and now am in this diploma. I certainly did not regret it. However, if I'm given a second chance, I think I might not venture into the same path. Due to the subject combination. I don't understand OB, I'm clueless at Accounting, I don't like drawing graph, but I think I have a flair for Math. So I think the subject I'm neutral towards might be Economics and Biz Stats. But then again, there's tons of concepts which is so complicating and conflicting. But this 2 subjects are definitely interesting. Marketing? I did not have a single idea what that subject is all about. it is like common knowledge, yet somehow it is not. And sociology is much better, with you writing crap! And you still get marks for crap.
We do not have second chance in life. For most of us. However, at one point or another, we made that decision. Whatever the outcome is, we'll have some memories of it. Be it good or bad. Just cherish the memories, since they are the only memories you might have only once in this lifetime.
Its kinda cheesy if I quote something that goes along the line that we do not cherish things…we take it for granted. Instead, the not so cheesy is…"Do cherish memories, for it might makes someone's day." I'm so freaking happy if I know that you still manage to know my name after 3 years. That you would still remember the good times we shared, and not forgetting the bad times. Well, you cannot exactly forget the negative aspect of memories. They are still memories, and memories are there to stay forever. I would be happy, if we are able to recall the same memory together, at the same time and at the same place.
Certain memories are definitely not meant for us to remember and recall. Like sarcastic remarks that are directed at you. You wouldn't remember all of it is it? So the brain works in a special manner, where you would not exactly remember the bad times you have had. But you'll remember the good time for a long time to come. Which is why I love my brain.
You made me understand that friendship is again, all so pretend-cious. It is all a mask, to shield each other from the embarassement, and to not hurt each other feelings. If one think that friends are there to hurt, to crap along with, for you to piss with, fine. Just go ahead and I'll gladly play along. I had seen the true human nature like since primary school? Where many people wore layers of coloured mask, with each coloure, comes with a different mind and values. All I'm asking is for you to not freaking play mind games with me. Just be straight forward. When you say anything, better mean it. Just like me, when I say anything, I mean it. Where you want to go? Anywhere. Sentosa? Okies :D and I'm happy with the arrangement. Do not think that I do not have my own conscience view point. I have my own principles. And I will not, for the sake of anything, change my principal.
I understand that my feelings towards you might not be the same of how you feel towards me. But I just so wish for you to understand that I'll be there for you. But I wonder where are we heading to right now? We are working based on existence. Where we know each other exist, and are there. But certainly, we do not really worked on trust. Perhaps I'm overly protective of you, and you, guarded against me. I might be sensitive about it. But I just so wish for you to know that I hope we could remain friends forever. :P I just feel like letting you know I felt a tinge of sadness whenever you ignore me, and that makes me think, what am I in your eyes. Of course, I would not ask you that in person. For that might ruin this perfectly distilled relationship between us.
That is a wonderful post. A long post, with each paragraph having different thing about different people. And it exceeded a thousand words! Today is certainly an emotional rollercoaster ride day! And my 11-1-11 hopes do came true!
Before I end, I just so wish everyone to know that dreams and aspiration shall never equates to this reality. This is quite harsh, but I do hope you'll not be in my footsteps, taking almost 6 years to figure that out. Be much more realistic. And people will love you.
Goodbye :D
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